As usual my dating life has hit a rough patch. And again I find myself confused. Fortunately, Ben Stein explained this thing called love earlier this week in terms I can understand. But, reading Steins article made me realize my dating problems are the same as my money problems. Namely, I am afraid of taking any risk. I want all my investments to come with a 8% return guaranteed, oh, and if you could give me a sucker when I come to check on my account I like that too, thanks. I like looking at my bank account to see all my money carefully stowed away where it is making next to nothing in interest, but hey, at least I'm not losing my shirt on Exon stock. Oh, wait...I'm doing that too, but that is beside the point. Everyday I look at my favorite stocks, and I think about what might have been (if only I would have bought a few shares last month!). Meanwhile Mrs. Perfect (ie. Mrs. Gee) just slipped through my fingers. I guess if I keep up this trend my love life will end up very similar to my bank account...empty.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Money or Love...I just can't win
As usual my dating life has hit a rough patch. And again I find myself confused. Fortunately, Ben Stein explained this thing called love earlier this week in terms I can understand. But, reading Steins article made me realize my dating problems are the same as my money problems. Namely, I am afraid of taking any risk. I want all my investments to come with a 8% return guaranteed, oh, and if you could give me a sucker when I come to check on my account I like that too, thanks. I like looking at my bank account to see all my money carefully stowed away where it is making next to nothing in interest, but hey, at least I'm not losing my shirt on Exon stock. Oh, wait...I'm doing that too, but that is beside the point. Everyday I look at my favorite stocks, and I think about what might have been (if only I would have bought a few shares last month!). Meanwhile Mrs. Perfect (ie. Mrs. Gee) just slipped through my fingers. I guess if I keep up this trend my love life will end up very similar to my bank account...empty.
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4 comments:
You should consider getting a personal relationship manager... and a broker.
First of all, nice self portrait. Well done.
Second, there is no way I believe your account is empty.
Third, stop being a pansy and just go for it. And, let’s be honest, the ROR on any one of your lady options is way better than anything you can find in the stocks or ever again in your life.
Finally, like I keep saying, the simple solution to all your problems is to marry me. Free cookies for life. Really, what more could you want?
You're not alone gavin. I thought that I had somethin' solid going on untill I got to church today and saw some other dude with his arm around her. And I thought it was a pretty solid investment. I've got no sound advice, but hopefully you'll find a little solace in the fact that there are plenty of us floundering right allong side of you. It's not your fault, and you're in noble company. -Jesse
I like this. I think you are clever.
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